2021 Reflection Pt. I

Photo by: Vanessa Leanne “Spring”
Photo by: Vanessa Leanne “Writing with Paranoia”
  • Throughout winter/spring, I took countless picture, mainly because I was obsessed with Instagram, and feel as if this may have been the reason for my engagement with life so often; I wanted to take pictures of what I was doing, and it had to be good (well, that’s what I thought then). Though, this obsession with having an aesthetically pleasing account made me far anxious on end oftentimes.
  • Since my obsession with Instagram, then, I began to go down a path that was not authentic to myself. I followed trends just to be a part of them, I spent hours organizing and planning for my account, etc., etc. The one trend I remember mostly committing myself to was drinking matcha. It’s not terrible, but I truly acted as if I was obsessed with this milk tea. This is a facepalm moment. I haven’t drank it since possibly the beginning of summer. The only thing I’m thankful to have committed to with the following of trends is creating a mindful morning routine. Waking up early is beyond revitalizing.
Photo by: Vanessa Leanne “7:00 a.m.”
  • As the weather fluctuated throughout the first few months of 2021, I went on a picnic almost every day. Saying spring is my favorite time of the year is an understatement. Nothing helps me recoup and reground myself as a picnic on a warm, bright day!
  • I have always held an interest with psychology and when I began taking my first class, I was instantly hooked; I never been so intrigued with a class before. With my newfound love of psychology, this is when I began branching out with my book choices as well.
Photo by: Vanessa Leanne “Serenity”
  • In January, I most likely ready The Subtle Art of Not Giving a F*ck roughly twenty times merely having it a couple months. Branching out to various other books on self-help in the area of psychology was the best decision I made, even though it was tough finally letting Mark Manson go. Though, I haven’t looked back since. Little did I know, though, on the other side of each book I read, I was closer to the most authentic self that I could’ve never imagined meeting.
  • During this time of enlightenment, I accomplished something that I feared never would happen, I finished writing my first feature film script. It took a little over several months to have polished and ready to be read, but I was never more exhilarated. When I first began writing it, I grew paranoid beyond words because more than anything, I wanted to see this script come to life; at the time, I feared death greatly.
  • Part of me sees this as a facepalm moment, but I had fun while it lasted…creating my own website. I truly thought placing my blog on my own website was the greatest idea that no one else had ever thought of and would skyrocket me to fortune and fame as a writer. To be fair, I merely wrote 1–2 times a week, so it’s safe to say that I admired the dream more than putting the work in. This idea is plausible, but it takes time, patience, and motivation to upkeep with your website. I may or may not revamp vanessaleanne.com one day in the future…
Photo by: Vanessa Leanne “Big Dreams, Big Ears”
  • Speaking of being a big dreamer that merely wishes the end result, I also decided on creating my own brand. Even more so than with a blog, building a brand is exceedingly difficult.

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Vanessa Leanne

Vanessa Leanne

Vanessa (n.): Writer, reader, & coffee enthusiast. A lover of 20th century poetry, abstract/contemporary art, & almond croissants at any given moment.